Birth trauma is not a new therapy-jargon invention – it’s been woven into the human experience for thousands of years. 

One of the most powerful examples of birth trauma comes from the Torah: the birth of Binyamin, the youngest of the twelve tribes.

As Binyamin was born, his mother Rachel died. It’s tragic when you stop to think about what must have happened on the roadside that fateful day: baby Binyamin let out his first cry… and that was the last sound Rachel ever heard. 

She was gone before their eyes could meet for the first time.

Binyamin’s birth was Rachel’s ultimate sacrifice, and their haunting bond of love and loss would echo throughout Binyamin’s life.

What is birth trauma?

Birth trauma is when mother or baby experience something during pregnancy, birth, or soon after that feels too overwhelming or painful to fully process. 

It leaves a lasting emotional impact, even when everything seems fine on the outside.

Birth trauma is a deep wound. It lays buried in the soul, under the day-to-day chaos of feedings, diaper changes and nap schedules.

But it doesn’t disappear. 

The overwhelming fear, the disappointing loss of what was supposed happen, the out-of-control terror… it lives on in a mother’s heart long after birth – and in her baby’s body.

What causes birth trauma?

Classic scenarios that can cause birth trauma

• Emergency C-section
• Severe tearing or hemorrhage
• Shoulder dystocia or baby stuck during delivery
• Uterine rupture
• Loss of consciousness
• Baby needing NICU right after birth
• Feeling completely out of control or terrified
• Being told baby or mother may not survive
• Coercion or lack of consent for interventions, large or small

Subtle experiences that can cause birth trauma in a mother

• Feeling unheard or ignored by medical staff
• Having birth plans dismissed or overlooked
• Experiencing fear or anxiety during labor without support
• Feeling shame or guilt for how the birth unfolded
• Feeling disconnected from her body or baby during birth
• Carrying unresolved sadness or confusion about the birth experience

Experiences that can cause birth trauma in babies

• Cord prolapse or true knot in umbilical cord
• NICU stay/ separation after birth
• C-section after baby was stuck or in distress
• Very long or fast (precipitous) labor
• Forceps or vacuum extraction
• Rough handling or overstimulation
• Lack of skin-to-skin after birth
• Oxygen deprivation or resuscitation at birth

Where life and death kiss

The Torah understands the nuances of human nature and the human experience – and birth trauma is no exception. 

In biblical times, a woman brought a mandatory Korban Chatas – a sin offering – after giving birth. 

Rav Samson Rafael Hirsch asks: Why would a woman who just gave birth bring a sin offering? What “sin” could possibly be ascribed to the holy act of bringing another soul down to this world?

None, says Rav Hirsch.

The chatas here is not for a sin. 

It’s to help the woman reenter life after experiencing the storm of childbirth. 

Giving birth is the most vulnerable position a woman is ever in, and many women (specifically in those times) looked death in the face during childbirth.

The korban is about transformation: it recognizes that in moments of profound upheaval, wavering is part of being human.

The korban chatas is there to help a woman process the trauma she went through during childbirth.  

A woman might emerge from giving birth physically whole, but emotionally and spiritually disoriented. 

Even in positive and uplifting birth experiences, there are moments of inner chaos. There is space in Torah for fear and despair.

And there is a path forward: for reentry, for integration, for healing and return to wholeness.

How trauma in a mother affects her baby

Mother and baby are deeply connected on every level: physically, emotionally, and energetically. 

When mother experiences trauma during pregnancy or birth, the baby feels and absorbs it too. This can lead to a tiny, unborn baby feeling unsafe or overwhelmed, in the earliest moments of life. 

Because they’re one unit, the mother’s unresolved fears, pain, or shock can imprint on the baby’s nervous system. This can show up after birth in feeding challenges, sleep difficulties or a baby that won’t settle. 

Son of my sorrow

As Rachel lay dying, she named her newborn Ben-Oni — son of my sorrow. 

This was Rachel’s truth: her final moments of pain and suffering. 

But then, in an unexpected plot twist, Yaakov overruled his dying wife’s wishes and changed the baby’s name. 

He renamed the baby Binyamin – son of my right hand.

The right hand symbolizes strength and success. 

A name of strength and direction. 

This was Yaakov’s way of elevating the family tragedy. 

Instead of letting his son be forever defined by the loss of his mother, he reframed the tragedy and affirmed a life of resilience for his son.

Yaakov wasn’t denying Rachel’s pain – he was refusing to let death have the final word. Yaakov lifted the heavy weight from Binyamin’s future by removing Ben-Oni – a name weighed down by sorrow and pain.

And by doing so, Yaakov teaches us an extraordinarily powerful lesson about trauma and healing:

Trauma cannot be ignored. It needs tending, and it is slow and deep work. And it’s not the final destination. The ultimate goal is to transform our pain and to use it to become deeper, greater, more developed versions of ourselves.

So while Rachel named her son from the depths of pain, Yaakov renamed him with the vision of who his son could become.

We all have a wolf inside

The trauma that Benyamin experienced at birth followed him throughout his life. 

We see this in the famous blessing Yaakov gave before his death:

בִּנְיָמִין זְאֵב יֹאכַל, וּבְבֹקֶר יַחֲלֹק שָׁלָל
“Binyamin is a ravenous wolf; in the morning he devours the prey, and in the evening he divides the spoil.“

Yaakov described Binyamin as a wolf, a predator, one who devours in the morning and divides its spoils at night.

This description of Binyamin seems harsh and jarring – not very fatherly. 

Until – you look at it through the lens of trauma and resilience.

The “morning” of Binyamin’s life symbolizes strength, aggression and survival instinct – the raw, untamed energy we sometimes need to get through life’s early battles.

“Evening” is maturity, integration, discernment – when we develop the ability to give, to share, to heal others from a place of hard-won wisdom.

This is the journey of the traumatized soul:

In the morning of your life – or in the survival mode phase after trauma – you devour. You’re in fight-or-flight. You’re scrappy. You’re doing what you need to do to survive. People get hurt along the way. 

In the evening of your life – once you’ve done the work – you share the spoils. You give back. You create. You protect. People are healed through you.

Yaakov describing Binyamin as a wolf wasn’t a negative description, or a curse.  It was an ode to his journey of healing. Binyamin knew sorrow and the deepest pain. But he also knew healing, integration, and leadership.

Birth trauma is a beginning.

Yes, it is a difficult and complex beginning, but it can lead to profound strength and purpose, just like the journey of Binyamin.

Binyamin’s Silence

Throughout the entire dialogue of Bereishes, Binyamin speaks… zero times. 

This is no coincidence.

 According to the Sfas Emes, Binyamin’s silence represents processing of deep inner pain. 

Binyamin embodies the soul of the Jewish people, who carry silent strength to transform suffering into meaning.

Binyamin is the archetype of moving through trauma without getting stuck in the story. 

Without getting stuck in a victim mindset. Instead of letting pain destroy him, he let it shape him and then built a powerful legacy.

The Torah’s perspective on birth trauma

Birth is not always the beginning of joy. Sometimes, it’s the beginning of grief, or at the very least, of many mixed emotions. And also: the most painful beginnings can still transform into healing and holiness.

Binyamin had the most painful, motherless beginning… and he built an incredible legacy. The Beis HaMikdash was built in his territory. Mordechai and Esther were descended from Binyamin. And today, all of us today trace our lineage to either Yehuda or Binyamin.

We carry his spiritual inheritance in our DNA.

The ability to go through something shattering and not lose who we are. A 2,000-year exile is trauma on a national and generational scale – and yet the power of Binyamin carries us through. We’re still standing today.

Yes – we’ve been born into rupture.

But we’re not broken beyond repair.

We can hold sorrow and strength. We can heal, individually and collectively – one mother and baby at a time.

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You can grab a sneak peek here.